Cape Cod Coma

Helloo sorry no posts or comments yesterday, I decided to escape to our Cape Cod house for the rest of the week for some relaxation after finishing work. I am soo very relaxed down here I feel like i'm in a coma lol! ok sooo i am coming back to reality tomorrow so i will resume posting and commenting then. xoxo

It's beeeeen a longgg time, shouldn't have left you...

....without a strong beat to step too stepp to. haaa anyway it has been SO long since my last post and A LOT has happened since then so i will give a dense and brief summary because i know you all have been LONGING for a post from me. JAYY KAY. ohh kayy here goes. I am going back to USC and I move into my loverlyyy apartment on Aug. 7th. I am beyond enthused and although I hit some bumps along the way I am doing a lot better on the eating front. I have been working A LOT waitressing pretty much 6 days a week making thattt green stuff babaayy, AND today is my last day of work because I will be packing up my life into boxes and moving down south on the 5th for a road trip with my momma. I am beyond excited and blessed that my mom and dad are so supportive and are giving me an opportunity to go to a school I love and live on my own. OHH and thats another thing I am actually living alone in my apartment which a little ifffy it was a big decision because I couldve lived with some girlfriends in an apartment but I feel like I go out so much at school I wanted some place to go back to that was all mine for some calming peace and quiet. So basically in the time i've been gone I finished my semester at a local school and made it on the deans list chickaa chickaaa yeeeeeeahh fake i.d.!! haha ( i love that movie) and was working an insane full time job but i got through it and am happy i did because i now have a sense of accomplishment and independance that I didn't have before. I will hopefully be blaaahging full time now that things in my life have settled into place but I have certainly beeeeen a lurker and have been catching up on your blogs and have misssssed peeeeeps furrrr suuure. So I will leave you sexxxyy mamacitas with some photos. LOVE TO YOU ALL so happy to be back in action.




Some sorority actionn

Getting excited for more of this sorority/football action!!

My uncle, g-ma, bro and me at a little fam fiesta

Have a GREAT day lovelies!

Happy Bunny Bunnyy Foo Foo Day!

Just thought i would leave yo with a little pic of my bro and besttt friend Jason, this was on a cruiseee on New Years! Any whooo onto the post...


So this shallll be brief but i had a GREAT time at dinner last night with my family. I stepped outside of my box i had a salmon with dinner but i indulged in some cheesey potatoes and a couple bites of cheesecake which may not souund like a lot but it was a big step for me. I had a really good time just hanging out with my family which we dont do enough of. lol when we got home we watched a TON of funny youtube videos lol we are sooo cool!! then this morning i woke up SO early and went for the most peaceful jog then helped momsyy prepare for easter. I dont know what it is guys i guess maybe the weather or my anti depressants are working but i have been feeling GREAT just soo soo happy. I think it also has a lot to do with my brother being around cuzz i lovee the bro! easter is going to be good some fam is coming over to wine and dine and my mom gave me a cutieee little easter basket which i will photog laterrr! have a GREAT easter ladiess i hope the bunny was goooood to ya'll!

Faja's Fiestaaaa!

HAA well tonight is my dads little dinn dinn celebration for his 50th birthday!! He has a huge surprise coming up in a few weeksss but i will recap that when it happens! i am just super excited to go out to dinner tonight (shock anddd awe) buttt it is because my brother is home from school for the weekend so we are all going out as a familyy so it will be nice!! I love my brother he is always fun to hang out with and i dont get to see him as much as i usually do. He keeps me calm at dinner so my anxiety stayss on the downnn low! anyway im off to get ready! have a good weekend/passover/easterr etc. chicass!

Hello, Hellooo

Good morning Bloggette's!
It has been a nice morning becausee it is FINALLY SUNNNYY yahhoo! I went for a nice jog this morning and felt the sunn shining in my face it was glorious! Tuesdays and Thursdays I dont have classes which is incredible except for monday, wednsdays and fridays when i have classes on overload! Soo today I am just going to bumb around and do some homework then i have to workkk boo :-/.... oh welll. I am in a reallyy good mood today, until i have to work. Ohh well i'm off to make a delicious egg white omelet with some serious veggie action and cinnnnamon raison toastyy. Peace out Girl Scouts!

It's Raining It's Pouring...

Me and Daddioo




Me and my Momsss

BOOO the weather is not cooperating. I want to have a little word with mothaa nature because i dont appreciate her antics. I'm feeling a lot less blue today, I woke up early and went for a leisurely jog around my town it was really refreshing. It put my mind at ease. I feel like i obviously used exercise before as an obsessive compulsive coping skill but now i am starting to find it much more relaxing and enjoyable. I am finding the the happy medium between moderate exercise and intense so i can find a healthy place in exercise. I had a little meltdown last night and my mom talked me down and there is something about her really believing that everything will be okay that soothes me and I really believe her. I have been blessed with the most supportive mother ever and i cant believe how lucky i am to have such supportive friends. I think now is the time in my life where i need to realize everything that is GOOD in my life and when i think about it there is a lot, and of course there will always be the bad but the good clearly overpowers the negative. I guess what i'm trying to say is to think more positively because i have so much to offer others and others have given me so much strength and advice and I AM NOT alone and i need to remember that. Have a great day Lovelie's <3<3

Moving In, Moving on

So sorry i havent written in a bit i have been struggling as of late. What's new when i am constantly trying to figure out life. Currently i am just trying to figure out WHAT IS IT THAT I WANT OUT OF LIFE? I just dont know what will make me happy. I have been so depressed lately and have let my weight go in a tail spin, i hate to say it and at the same time Ed loves to say it but i am down to the weight i was when i was admitted my first time into treatment and i just dont know what to do. I honestly dont think i can stomach going back into residential because i just dont think it helps me, it works for like weeks... and then BAM its back. i am at a crossroads and i dont know which direction i will take and what it will take for me to pick the right direction. I wish i could write something profound and positive on here and i wish i was writing how completely fabulous i was doing but that wouldnt be honest and i feel all of you deserve honesty. I need to find myself somehow and figure out the path i want to take in life that will lead me to health and happineess. BLAH i dont know i will be better about commenting on all your blogs have a good night and i will leave you with this quote ...


“Our destiny changes with our thought; we shall become what we wish to become, do what we wish to do, when our habitual thought corresponds with our desire.” Orison Swett Marden